Let’s face it, nobody dated the weird, creepy kids in high school and it’s going to be the same thing for them once they get out into the dating scene.  In fact, nothing changes too much from college to the work world when it comes to getting laid: if you’re creepy and weird, get ready to be alone or only attract creepy and weird chicks.

But if you want to attract normal, hot women, it’s important that you don’t come off weird or creepy (whether you really are creepy and weird or not!) because you’ll never find a woman that way.

Don’t Be Weird and Creepy

  • Do you have a boyfriend?  Actually, don’t tell me because I’m going on your Facebook right now to find out.
  • I’m a foreigner.  I have Russian hands and Roman fingers… no, that’s not a line.  They’re actually from the last two girls that turned me down.
  • You remind me of Pokémon.  Not only do I want to be Pikachu, but I want to keep you in a big plastic ball in my house and tell you over and over again how I choose you.
  • That shirt would look great on my floor, especially right next to the pile of panties I stole from your room before I came here.
  • Squeeze my balls as hard as you can.
  • You’re a princess and I’m your frog.  Kiss me.  Ribbit!
  • Want to go Dutch on an illegitimate child?
  • I’ve been sitting across the room watching you all night.
  • Do you believe it’s our civic responsibility to help the homeless? (She says yes).  Good, then take me home with you.
  • I’ve been undressing you with my eyes all night.  It’s time to find out if I guessed where all your moles and tattoos are.
  • I don’t want to come between you and your friends… unless you’re into that.
  • Which one of you ladies has the lowest standards?  I want to know who I have the best shot with tonight.
  • Would you prefer I wait for you in your car or your closet?
  • Ever met someone you’re going to hate before?
  • You should surprise your roommate and not come home tonight.  I’ll even make calls to her saying you were kidnapped.
  • Did you take your birth control pills today?
  • Want to play the rape game? (She says no).  That’s the spirit!
  • That outfit looks like something I saw on one of those Dateline Murder mysteries.
  • Did you just fart because you’re blowing me away?
  • I’d love to be your tear so I can be born in your eye, live on your cheek and die on your lips.
  • Want to see a neat trick I learned in prison?
  • My mother has those same shoes.  And that dress.  And that hair… want to help fix my mommy issues?
  • If you think that’s impressive, you should see when the cold sores really flare up!
  • Hey, do you mind if I stand over here for a while until it’s safe to go back where I just farted?
  • Are you really drunk or do you just have a lazy eye?
  • I’m having a bet with a friend over there on who has the biggest butt in the place.  Do you mind if I just wrap my arms around you and take a quick measurement?
  • How do you like your eggs in the morning: scrambled or fertilized?
  • Would you like to help save me from becoming a virgin again?
  • If you got a hitch, I got pickup truck.
  • If I were to follow you home, you wouldn’t call the cops like your roommate did, right?
  • Hey, every once in a while you can wave to the tree outside your window.  It gets lonely up there at night.
  • Do you know CPR because I accidentally just gave your friend too many roofies.  Aw, never mind.  I’m sure she’ll be alright.  Care for a drink?
  • People always tell me to be myself but I’m weird and creepy and have tons of kinky fetishes.  So instead, I’ll be Josh.  Hi, I’m Josh.
  • Guess where I’m not ticklish.
  • Have you ever heard of Megan’s Law?  I hope not.
  • What are you willing to strap onto yourself in the interests of better lovemaking?
  • Anything from Twilight movies, e.g. my sister can see the future and it’s me and you.

Understanding Women and the Art of Scoring

So, now that you’ve seen what not to say (don’t say any variations of the above lines either), the next logical question on your mind should be, “What do I say to women if I want to score?”  The answer to that is fairly simple – at least much simpler than many people would have you believe.

In fact, by clicking here, I can guarantee that you’ll be killing it with the ladies in no time at all – that wasn’t weird and creepy, was it?

ps. If you have some other creepy lines you’d like to share, please feel free to tell more about them using the form below… :)

More pickup lines:

Other related articles: